Saturday, November 25, 2006

Sunday Scribblings ~Nemesis~

Firstly I have meant to do all the Sunday Scribblings, but have missed the last say 3 of them? Hopefully I can catch up on these soon.
Lots going on in my life at this time, and I am making a point of writing!

Okay so my nemesis is not someone imparticular, it's a whole mindset that some people have.
How do I explain? I guess the best way I know how.
I sometimes get very anxious and have an anxiety disorder of some sort. It could be due to stress in my life, living in S, Korea and then returning to my home and learning how to re-enter into my normal everyday routine that I had here. Or that I try to fit some sort of normal mold, but then again what is normal? It's just something society has put on us isn't it?
I am sensitive and I won't lie about that. I am very much a people person, try to help others out etc. I can be your best friend, but if you cross me too many times, I can detest you...

I hate being put in a box and labelled, because of some people that don't understand me.
I find it almost ignorant that because I maybe had an anxiety attack, that others go, "what's wrong?", "I don't understand you"...did anyone tell you that you had to understand me? Do I look into your life and go I don't get you? Well sometimes yes, sure we all do. But isn't trying to put yourself in someone else's shoes and trying to see from their viewpoint beneficial?
I can't stand ignorance. And if others want to label me or others with something, go ahead. You are not in my life, you have no idea what goes on in my life, my mind etc...

I know this sounds bitter, maybe I am bitter right now.

Just got let go at a job, due to me having a hard day. It happened, we get over it, we move on right?
Wrong we get told we are let go. Umm excuse me, you suffer from the same things as I do, but instead I am let go...

So I guess my nemesis are those that are ignorant and can't take a few minutes to view something from someone else's viewpoint, or to look in with compassion....

Thanks for stopping by, seriously I am not going to bite. ;)

I'll try to write something more nicely next time, hehe...right now I just needed to get that out. Thanks Sunday Scribblings.

Sure hope this made sense, and that I didn't mess it up. lol...

Friday, October 27, 2006

Sunday Scribblings ~Bedtime~

She was a restless woman, mind was always racing. She took sleep when it found her. Every night at bedtime, life crept into her dreams, and made for many sleepless nights. She awoke in a sweat, whimpering, feeling as tired as when she went to bed the night before.
She slowly opened her eyes and glanced at the alarm clock. It was 6am, she fumbled with the covers not really wanting to get out of bed and wander out to the real world. Could she face the day? What lay ahead of her?
She sat up on the side of the bed, rubbed her eyes, and with a quick movement removed herself from the warmness that she had lay in....
She would deal with the day as it came, and wait for the next time, *bedtime* that presented itself to her.

**Thanks for reading, I haven't written a short story in quite some time, I usually write poems, scrapbook etc. Well this week I attempted to write a very short story, maybe in the near future it'll be longer.**

Saturday, October 14, 2006

"Sunday Scribblings" ~If she could turn back time~

If she could turn back time. . .

If she could turn back time, she would go back to the moments in her life
When it meant the most
The times she spent with her father before her parents divorced
While she was a child and felt unimportant
The indulgence of popcorn with her grandfather
The walks and laughter shared with her dear granny
The guy she met years ago, the things that should have been said, that weren’t
The day of her wedding, time went so fast
The two years of being in South Korea, her heart longed to be there again
The carefree days of college…
The times the dr’s messed with her pills, wish she had a voice back then
To all the times she thought she couldn’t do things…
To go back in time would be nice, but she had to focus on the present and future…
She still wished tho at times…


Saturday, September 30, 2006

Sunday Scribblings....~Comfortable in my own skin~

Well "skin" was the writing prompt this week for Sunday Scribblings, and this is the poem I came up with. Short but sweet.
Thanks for stopping by...

Comfortable in my own skin.....

This is me, inside all of this miraculous body that God created
You can touch me and I can feel you,
Feel the warmth of my skin, the scent of my soft body
Takes my breath away
As close as we get, I sometimes feel so far away
I long for you to touch every part of me, to the depth of my soul

Friday, September 22, 2006

Sunday Scribblings # 26 ~Instructions~

First of all this is what the dictionary says of the meaning of, “instructions”
in·struc·tion [ in strúkshən ]
noun (plural in·struc·tions)
1. statement of command: a spoken or written statement of what must be done, especially delivered formally, with official authority, or as an ordergot instructions to cooperate fully
2. teaching or things taught: teaching in a particular subject or skill, or the facts or skills taughtdriving instruction
3. teaching process or profession: the act, process, or profession of teaching
4. comput, computer command: a code that tells a computer to perform a specific operation

plural noun in·struc·tions Definition:
1. list of things to do: printed information about how to do, make, assemble, use, or operate somethinginstructions for setting up your e-mail
2. law judge's summary: the information given by a judge to a jury at the end of a case that explains the applicable points of law and summarizes what has to be proved

***So after reading that this is what I think on the subject. If someone gives me a set of instructions, fine, but go slow while saying them. My brain can only take so much in okay? Or write them down so that I can go and check them out, exactly how you want them done. If you says things in a bossy way, I’ll do them, but maybe with not the best attitude.

When I went to high school it was a private school. So I worked alone in my books, or what we called, paces. So I did have to read instructions etc and work on it alone, I could ask one of the adults there of course and was crossing my fingers they dang well knew. ;)

Now when I taught in S. Korea. I sometimes had to get a Korean teacher in the room, just to clarify what I wanted the students to do. Sometimes it was annoying, because of the communication difficulties. But I made do and lots of time I just had to show them what I meant on the white board, and hopefully they could understand that.

But, What can I say tho? I really dislike instructions, myself personally. Yes I know they are set there for me to know how to do something or put something together. I am the type that would rather actually watch someone do something and learn that way. Not always the best solution tho is it?

I can look at instructions and still go, “huh?" , “what the heck do I do?”
Things go better when you actually sit down and read the instructions when putting something together etc…

I remember in elementary getting lots of questions wrong, because I would not take the time to read the instructions on what to do. I guess I was ahead of the game and actually just get the assignment done.

Like I said I am a hands on type of gal. If you were to ask me how I scrapbook and give you instructions for each thing I do, I would try to. I just pretty much go at it…freestyle. I could do it, but it would take me a little bit to really think of the best way to explain.

Anyways I am doing better, I am actually learning new creative techniques and totally enjoying , every minute of it! And I am learning instructions!

Something I found online, these are great! Enjoy.

Instructions for Life
A loving atmosphere in your home is so important,
do all you can to create a tranquil harmonious home.Always be sincere, whether you mean it or not.
Approach love and cooking with reckless abandon
Be confident or pretend to be.
Be engaged at least six months before you get married.
Be gentle with the earth.Be just as enthusiastic about the success of others as about your own.
Beware of the person who has nothing to lose.
Believe in love at first sight.
Dance like nobody's watching.
Don't be afraid to say "I don't know".
Don't believe all you hear or spend all you have or sleep all you want.
Don't expect life to be fair.
Don't judge people by their relatives.
Don't let a little dispute injure a great friendship.
Don't start rumors and/or contribute to petty gossip.
Don't trust a person who doesn't close his/her eyes when you kiss.
Compliment people when they deserve it.
Give people more than they expect and do it cheerfully.
Hope for the best and prepare for the worst.
If love you love someone dearly, show it.
If you make a lot of money, put it to use helping others while you are living.
That is wealth's greatest satisfaction.
If you want to cheer yourself up, you should try cheering someone else up.
In disagreements, fight fairly.
No name calling.
In disagreements with loved ones, deal with the current situation.
Don't bring up the past.
Judge your success by what you had to give up in order to get it.
Keep in touch with your family.
Keep secrets.Learn the rules then break some.
Learn to listen.
Learn to say no politely and quickly.
Listen to your brain. It has lots of information.
Live a good, honorable life.
Then when you get older and think back, you'll get to enjoy it a second time.
Love deeply and passionately.
You might get hurt but it's the only way to live life completely.
Make new friends but cherish the old ones.
Marry a person you love to talk to.
As you get older, their conversational skills will be as important as any other.
Memorize your favorite poem.
Mind your own business.
Never deprive someone of hope; it might be all he/she has.
Never interrupt when you are being flattered.
Never laugh at anyone's dreams.
People who don't have dreams don't have much.
Never pay for work before it's completed.
Never stop learning new things.
Never take action when you're angry.
Never underestimate the power of forgiveness.
Notice those that love you, and return the gift.
Once a year, go someplace you've never been before.
Open your arms to change, but don't let go of your values.
Perform a daily random act of kindness.
Pray. There's immeasurable power in it.
Pray not for things, but for wisdom and courage.
Read between the lines.
Read more books and watch less TV.
Remember the three R's: Respect for self; Respect for others; Responsibility for all your actions. Say "bless you" when you hear someone sneeze.
Share your knowledge.
It's a way to achieve immortality.
Smile when picking up the phone. The caller will hear it in your voice.
Solve your problems rather than just worry about them.
Spend some time alone.
Spend some time with your children.
Talk less and listen more.
Talk slowly but think quickly.
Time is the most precious thing you have.
Give it generously to the ones you care about.
Treat people as you want to be treated.
Trust in God but lock your car.
When someone asks you a question you don't want to answer, smile & ask, "Why do you want to know?"
When you lose, don't lose the lesson.
When you realize you've made a mistake, take immediate steps to correct it.
When you say, "I'm sorry", look the person in the eye.
When you say, "I love you", mean it.
Work like you don't need the money.
Collected from various sources.

Learn from Life
A person can only be truly different by being themself.
Great love and great achievements involve great risk.If you do not show trust, you will not be trusted.
Life sometimes does give you a second chance.
Making a living is not the same thing as making a life.Not getting what you want is sometimes a stroke of luck.
Silence is sometimes the best answer.
Silent company is often more healing than words of advice.
The best relationship is one in which your love for each other exceeds your need for each other.
The greater a person's sense of guilt, the greater his need to cast blame on others.
You are never too old to hold your father's hand.
Your character is your destiny.
Collected from various sources.

Thanks for stopping by! :)

Sunday, September 17, 2006

"Sunday Scribblings",Google it really worth it?

Okay so this isn't the best choice for a topic, but hey I needed to research it anyways. I have been on these for like 12 1/2 years, and am now trying to make the choice of whether to change the ones I am on? Or just go off them altogether. I did some research on them, and this is what I came accross!!!

ADVERSE REACTIONS An increased risk of the following serious adverse reactions has been associated with the use of oral contraceptives (see "Warnings" section):


Arterial thromboembolism.

Pulmonary embolism.

Myocardial infarction.

Cerebral hemorrhage.

Cerebral thrombosis.


Gallbladder disease

Hepatic adenomas or benign liver tumors.

There is evidence of an association between the following conditions and the use of oral contraceptives, although additional confirmatory studies are needed:

Mesenteric thrombosis

Retinal thrombosis.

The following adverse reactions have been reported in patients receiving oral contraceptives and are believed to be drug related



Gastrointestinal symptoms (such as abdominal cramps and bloating).

Breakthrough bleeding


Change in menstrual flow.


Temporary infertility after discontinuation of treatment.


Melasma which may persist.

Breast changes: tenderness, enlargement, secretion.

Change in weight (increase or decrease)

Change in cervical erosion and secretion.

Diminution in lactation when given immediately postpartum.Cholestatic jaundice.


Rash (allergic)

Mental depression.

Reduced tolerance to carbohydrates

Vaginal candidiasis.

Change in corneal curvature (steepening)

Intolerance to contact lenses.

The following adverse reactions have been reported in users of oral contraceptives, and the association has been neither confirmed nor refuted:

Congenital anomalies.

Premenstrual syndrome.


Optic neuritis

Changes in appetite.

Cystitis-like syndrom





Loss of scalp hair

Erythema multiforme

Erythema nodosum

Hemorrhagic eruption



Impaired renal function

Hemoticuremic syndrome

Budd-Iniari syndrome


Changes in libido


Sickle-cell disease

Cerebral-vascular disease with mitral valve prolapse.

Lupus-like syndromes

Okay huh? some of these I am like what's that? that's alot to comprehend...*yes I know alot to read, sorry, but why on earth did my dr not tell me some of my health problems could be from my birth control pills? I mean he's retired now, and I went to see a new dr, and he said maybe I should switch. Well someone else pointed out why not just go off them entirely. Yes there is a chance I could get pregnant, but I have been married over 12 years and nothing...if it happens it happens. But if these small pills might be creating problems for me, and could do more damage down the road than good, then I think I would rather go off them entirely...

So this is my research for this week, I would spend more time on this but I have lots to do for a new I am now getting a headache, lol.... Yes got a job at a new scrapbooking store that is opening up this coming week, so I am off to create...and write some poems etc. Maybe I'll share some with you in the near future...

Next time hopefully my entry will be a little more lighthearted.

Thanks for stopping by.

Thursday, September 07, 2006

Sunday Scribblings #24, I would never write...

Hmm good question. I am a very open person, I love to talk. Guess I have the gift of the gab...

Anyways I really don't think I would write about my medical history. No nothing life threatening at all....

Something I went thru when I was child. It was has caused so many problems for me in my life, even still pops up at me and I just cringe of the thought of it ever happening again. I used to get unwanted attention because of it and I hated it! I detested it.

I mean I get paranoid sometimes and I just go, "Kellie, it's over, relax", and just try to forget about it.

I sometimes think about it every single day, and just go relax it's over...

I even hate writing about it right now, but I to push myself.

I haven't told many people, and I don't tell people I don't even know, sometimes I feel almost like I should, but for whose sake? It's over right? But none the less it has caused problems for me to this day. Anxious thoughts etc, and I almost feel like I need to give people an explanation for why I act in certain ways.

Oh well this too will pass. But will it, I mean it's been over 17 years now...why does it keep bugging me?

I don't even want to say what is was, see this is something I really wouldn't write about, so I am like totally ditching what it's really about.

I have heard people or seen people make fun of this medical problem and it makes me so pissed off, pardon the language. I just feel like throttling them, how could you be so insensitive? I imagine if they knew they wouldn't of said anything at all.

It's nothing that I did, that I had this when I was a child, it was genetic, so it happened.
I sometimes wonder why it happened to me? Why me? Could my life be different?
I guess I just have to accept it, and quit with the, "What if's?"....that's the only way to deal with life, straight on honest....

I have visions of it sometimes, reliving the motions.

I hope this passes, I hope I can live one day without thinking of this. Just one day....

So this is what I would never write, but did, but in a round-a- bout way. You still don't really know what it's about.

Sunday, September 03, 2006

Sunday Scribblings ~Fortune Cookies~

Fortune Cookies
I love these cookies! I rarely get them tho. Go in and order some Chinese food and the best part is getting the fortune cookies with your bill.
I think for me it’s not what my fortune says, cuz, I don’t really believe in that sort of thing. But that you know there is something in the cookie. The cookie is amazing!
My inlaws said, “you are supposed to say what your fortune is, and then after add, “in bed”. I kind of shook my head. Here they are way older than me, and they have filthy minds, hehe.
What does fortune mean? Isn’t it supposed to be something wonderful that is going to happen to you?
Do you think we have our own right to make these so called, “Fortunes” to come true? In some ways yes.
I think some people get the wrong cookie, that should be my fortune not theirs~!